Saturday, October 20, 2012

Pros and Cons of Being Short

I'd like to think I've became quite pro at this whole being short thing.  Ever since I was slightly below average height in Elementary School – I think I’ve definitely figured out the good and bad about being short.

Cons of Being Short:
  • "What up, shorty"...just doesn't get old. Oh wait -- it does.
  • Buying Jeans. You have to hem EVERYTHING. Buying pants in short is so hard. They don't usually carry them.
  • Looking like a child (and sounding like a child)…“Are you old enough to do that?” so annoying. I guess it will pay off when I’m old.
  • “Damsel in distress” happens nearly every day when trying to reach for things.  You have to use stools for EVERYTHING or ask a cute boy to get things for you (which could be a good thing…)  But this is contradicting for the pro that you can get low shelf items easier.
  • Getting picked last for sporting events. We just don’t look like we have much game…and let’s be honest…most of us don’t. But some do!
  • Dance Parties – (my head is elbow height) Also applies to concerts.
  • Shorter Legs – I can’t run as fast. 
  • When you’re pregnant you look HUGE.  But some may say it looks cute, but let’s be honest…they’re really making fun of you. A great example = Snookie.
  • You’re always expected to take the hump seat in the back of the car.
  • The awkward doorstep scene when they have to bend their knees and you’re struggling to stay balanced as you kiss goodnight. The key though is to stand on a stair. Also holding hands is hard sometimes you have to bend your arm upward to reach his.
  • We suck at fighting. Someone can put us in a headlock or something and you can’t get out. However, we are in a perfect location for a great kneeing.

Pros of Being Short:
  • Being able to date pretty much anyone the heck I want! There is like a 95% chance that I am taller than any boy that asks me out…so I’ve got that going for me.
  • Being able to fit into smaller spaces without ducking. Yeah…sucks for all you tall people who have to slouch down to fit in a tunnel or something where for me I just casually can walk on through.  Playing on toys at a park is where this is prime.
  • Awkward things are cuter when you’re short.  Just like a little kid.  When they spill their milk everyone just laughs and checks to make sure they’re okay…"oops.."
  • You don’t look like an idiot using child size things.  SUCH AS- drinking from the child drinking fountain--Much shorter lines, and well, you look fairly normal.  Also, you don’t look like a pedophile when standing by the children.
  • Children accept you as one of them. You can play with them and they like you 20x more than a tall person--You just fit in.
  • Falling hurts much less. If you trip you have much less chance of hurting yourself and also, your fall it will happen quicker so you’ll look less retarded.
  • Two words: FRONT ROW.
  • I recently found that I can fit into child size shoes….which is quite possibly the best thing ever. Children shoes are pretty much half the price of adult shoes…and they’re just as cute! I mean…besides the ones that look super childlike. Exhibit A-I got some Asics running shoes for $40 that are pink and super cute…where as the adult ones are $80. Bam.
  • People just feel inclined to protect you.
  • If you are tall, everyone expects you to carry the team in sand volleyball, or basketball. If you are short, you have ZERO pressure, and if you score everyone is so proud.
  • Everyone loves hugging the short girl who fits nicely around your waist and under your arm.
  • Cuddling is much easier if you’re short. Awkward to say that…but you all know it’s true.
  • Sleep like a queen in a twin size bed.
  • In general, we're just more space efficient, also in a zombie war or something…you can’t eat what you can’t find… so yeah. Hide and Seek at its finest.
  • Also, another comparison -- ever meet a puppy you didn’t like? Exactly.

1 comment:

  1. Story of my life. Although there aren't many pros on the male end of things... I laid it all out similarly on my blog haha.