Sunday, November 21, 2010

Pursuing Happiness

Everyday I realize how much is changing in the world...and it scares me. I notice things about me changing-for the better or the worse. I notice myself constantly setting goals for myself and then see them crash before me. I also notice temptations arising that scares me how common they are becoming occurrences in my life. I scare myself soooo much, and it worries me for the future.

What triggered this little post was me thinking about people I'm close to changing. I notice the change in them and then I look at myself. Everyone is trying to become better -- for the better or the worse. Let me explain that. For example everyone is trying to be better. That's an obvious statement...but what people don't think about is how being "better" is sometimes perceived as different things for different people. Being better for one person could be stopping drinking, and being better for another person is begin drinking so you're viewed as more fun and outgoing in social situations. I hate how this varies for different people...and it scares me. I look at those close to me, in which I've seen slip up and fall into temptation and it scares me sooo bad. I watch people I am close to and love oh so much, fall so hard. They might not see it at the moment, but I watch a part of them die. I see people I once looked up to, and wished to be like, totally become a different person in a matter of weeks or days. I watch them "have fun" as seen from the world, and try so hard to get others involved just so they feel less of a bad person. Everyone has a conscience. It scares me to see how some people totally disregard this and bring themselves down.

I have the want to become better...and it scares me when sometimes I change for the want to be better-worse. Peer pressure is everywhere around...and it scares me when I watch my thoughts alter to those around me and start to wish to "have more fun," etc. I want to be good. It's just sooo hard to be when I see those close to me fall, those who I look up to and want to be like. I think, "well they're a good person...and their doing it...so why can't I?" Ugh. This is exactly what Satan wants in this world. Justification. I watch it so much in my life. "I'll stop when I meet the guy I want to marry." "I'll stop when I make more friends." "I'll stop at the end of the year." Excuses. Justification. I need to stop letting myself turn to these procrastinating thoughts. The question is how, when I see so many others just waiting til the timing is perfect for them.
I need and want a change in my life...I just am uncertain to how. People affect me so much, and it is so hard to do what's right when something stands in the way. One reason I think I want to go on a mission is because I know/hope that I'll be around those people that I wish to become like.

I love this quote by Marilyn Monroe:
"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
-Marilyn Monroe

I just hope to apply this to my life and have it prove something to me. I can't wait for the holidays. I can't wait to be around those who love me unconditionally, and who I look up to so much. Not saying that here there aren't those people, I just know that at home I am who I want to be. Well, more of who I want to be.

This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also I have decided that sisters make the best friends in the world. As for boys, well, they'll come and go too. And I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find the one you're supposed to be with. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about. Stand for something.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Family

I love a lot of people i love...but we'll start with family. Cause they're...THE BEST. :)
Many people wonder why i go home so here's why!:
Meet the Crew:
_________
Mom & Dad:
BEST parents in the ENTIRE world. no joke.
they're always there to talk and they have such great advice and they're always just simply, amazing. my mom is the best cooker/cleaner. and my dad is the best gardener/fixer. my mom is honestly one of the first people i call in a problem, and always listens and understands me. my dad is such a little goof ball and is super fun to talk to and great. i couldn't have asked for a better family to come to.

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Michelle! (aka Chely):
BEST older sister anyone could ask for! She's constantly
giving me someone to look up to and want to be like!
she's the nicest person in the whole world and she'll always
uplift you! she currently shares her huge room with me whenever i go home! :) and doesn't even complain. haha. except when i drive her nuts with my midnight rants. (ask any of my roommates) haha.... i like to talk before i go to bed...my poor husband haha.

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Brooklyn (aka Brooke):
one of my best friends! i'm constantly texting her and she's probably got a lot of my same personality! other than she's reallyyyy good with boys...and i'm well, shyer than (insert some kind of shy animal here) . anyway, she's great. and she always knows what to say and help me out with situations. verrry understanding.
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Brianne (aka Brie or Annie):
Baby of the clan and absolutely great! witty and smart
and lovable! She's always the best when you're sick
to come give you a hug and i love talking to her about boys and stuff! (great secret keeper!) she also is one of the cutest little 8th graders on the planets!

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Couple fun pics of us:)
Well, that's my family in a nut shell. They're the people i love the most! :) and they're great. couldn't have asked for a better one!

thingssss i love/hate

Besides the usual, "family", "friend" responses to things I love...here are material things that i well, couldn't live without. also...things i absolutely hate. (this is done in pure boredom and the luxury of having a computer at work).

10 Things I LOVE:


cereal&milk
naturally, everyone who knows me well enough, should be able to guess this right off the bat. i love cereal. currently my favorite is fruity dino bites. considering i eat cereal for literally, more than half my calories for the day...i think you'd realize how much i love it.♥
computerrrr
i guess by now everyone should know i'm a bit of a computer nerd...so i won't elaborate too much on this one... i just love them soooo much. inside and out. weird.
phone
duh. common sense. but no, i literally would have the hardest time living without it...and ya. my iphone contains my life. literally. no joke. from homework, schedule, etc.
planner
yep. i know it's sort of lame and old fashioned. and i know that i have everything plugged into my phone...but there's a sense of comfort i have of putting everything in a planner and having it all laid out in front of me. i just like it. i also love writing (my handwriting...not the actual "english" thing...yuck). Seeing my handwriting and yeah. it's fun. drawing pictures in here and there and every night writing what i did that night (exciting or not) helps me stay organized and i love looking back at it. i secretly like to leave it in places so others look at it and see how cool i am. ;)
ice cream/ketchup (not together)
it's really sad that i put food on here...but hey. you gotta live somehow. i love ice cream soooo much. ketchup also falls under this category. it's awesome and ohhh so yummy.
jeans
yeah i love a good pair of jeans. the kind that you wash all the time just so you can wear them ALL the time. yeah...that's them.
4 colored pens
you know the little BIC pens that have 4 colors: red, blue, green and black? well, i LOVE them soooooo much. i have my journal color coded into them. and well, they're the best most organizable pens in the entire world.
journallllllll
as previously mentioned, i have a journal....which i love. i literally tell it everything. even those secrets that i tell people i won't tell. but my journal isn't a person...sooo? therefore i'm not loosing anyone's trust. my fear is that someone will read this blog and then decide to take a gander into my journal....sooooo if this is you: DO NOT. :) i love my journal and it really helps me vent and sort all my issues out in my head. it's great. i take it on vacations...etc.:)
scriptures
i know this is a common, "mormon" answer...but i literally couldn't live without it.
cardigans
haha...i figured i'd throw this in. i love cardigans. they're awesome. they're the cute little jacket things you throw over anything that pulls an outfit together! they come in all colors...etc. i love them. and have bazillions of em. (origininally i had "bagillions"...but apparently it isn't a word--bazillions however is (according to mozilla's spell checker) soooo believe it or not but it is just thought you'd like to know :) )
gum!
i know this is 11, but i randomly thought of it. and it's quite amazing. freshens your breath and is fun to chew.
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10 Things I HATE:

know it all/bossy people
ugh. they get under my skin. they seriously just drive me crazy. i would say i'm generally a nice person...however... they just...ugh. enough said.
TOO friendly people
i love cuddling. it's great. cuddling with friends is also way fun :) and there's absolutely nothing wrong with it...until it gets out of hand. i hate hate it when you see one of your guy friends go sit on the laps of a girl and whatever. idk. i guess it's not as bad if a guy does it. but i hate when girls do it. go drape themselves over every guy that crosses their paths. bugs.

studded/thick stitched pants (on guys)
is it necessary to spend $200 on pants...? idk, i just don't like it when guys spend more money on clothes than i do. i love shopping...and if guys do too...that could be an issue when i get married. there's nothing wrong with $30 american eagle jeans...however...not buying atleast nice jeans is an issue too. walmart jeans=no thankyou. guys, you're cute enough without accentuating your butts with studs and thick stitching. maybe everyone once in a while...but yeah.
hair.
bleh. hair is disgusting everywhere. on guys...well, there's some places it's acceptable...but if their legs and arms are covered in inch thick black fuzz...there's a problem. and on women...enough said. light hair isn't so bad...but darker...yeah. do the world a favor and trim a little. i also hate finding hair in random places...like roommate's hair. for some reason my hair doesn't gross me out (i think it's the same for everyone) but yeah.
sunglasses in buildings
yeah. there's no sun. not necessary. also...its slightly weird to drape them over your shirt or hat just so everyone "knows" your cool.
sport team arguments
well, i guess growing up in a family of all girls (minus my dad), i haven't really watched sports too often...and so i know that lots of people get in HUGE arguments about sports and who wins...but really? they're a team. arguing about who is better won't help the team win...i'm sorry. and it doesn't really matter who wins anyway..
music listeners
ok, we all know those people who CONSTANTLY have to have a headset on...for either phone reasons or music listening. i mean, really? why do you need it all the time? join the world and take it out for a second. it's really annoying to talk to someone who is listening to music cause you never really feel like they're listening to you...and it's way annoying if they take a call while talking to you also..
criticizers/complainers
if you complain...you bug me. or if you're always like "meagan ugh...just do this" it really irritates me. LEAVE ME ALONE. suck it up. if i ask for advice then give it...
making facebook into a public diary
okay, everyone doesn't need to know what you're doing every second of everyday. no one really wants to hear how much you love your boyfriend/girlfriend (except maybe them). "Meagan Young has the best boyfriend ever!!!!! and i enjoy rubbing it in everyone's face." yep. that's what i'm talking about. or the people who do the whole "Meagan Young is at work. Meagan Young is driving home." well, if you like to do this...then get a diary, or maybe twitter? idk.
TOO dirty
when people have converstaions that are WAY discustingly dirty. i'm not saying i'm miss innocent, i love a dirty joke. haha. but when they get all gross and out of hand...that's where i stop. Most of the time i'm good at this, and don't mind it...but when it does get gross. stop.

Halloween!

Ok, so according to mean girls (the best show in the entire world), it says:
"In the real world, Halloween is when children dress up in costumes and beg for Halloween. In girl world, Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it."
Haha...Well, in the life of Meagan Young...Halloween is one of the funnest holiday's out there! Pretending to be something else for a night...is awesome. This year, Halloween consisted of going to the SUU howl and then going to Dixie's! I was none other than the way common, but cool, "Pirate." But sadly Johnny Depp couldn't make it to accompany me....



I love my friends....I love Halloween. end of story:)